O.M.G!!!! I need to be unscrambled!

Podcast Posting for the B-Side with Mrs. B

The past couple of days since coming back from vacation having been hella wonky with my ADD\ADHD-Type C. I feel like we needed another week to fully reset. I am still very disjointed in my thoughts and how I am going about writing this would make most of you cringe!

LOL!!! Seriously though, I am writing a paragraph, skipping around thought wise, all while meme searching, and watching an episode of a show. If I stop one of these things I do not think I would be able to complete this post as needed.

Even though my focus is split I will get this done, because that is how I work, that is how I function. Now you may be wondering with all that madness mentioned above… What is ADHD-C? ADHD-C or combined type. This, the most common type of ADHD, is characterized by impulsive and hyperactive behaviors as well as inattention and distractibility. Make a bit more sense now? I bet it does 😉

Now couple that with my brain fog that I get from my auto immune disorders and BLAM its a recipe for one very confused mixed up squirrel at a rave!

Another example of my scattered self recently… We accidently stayed an extra day on vacation, this is the first time we have EVER done something like this. I was absolutely stunned that I allowed that to happen. I am usually on point with any traveling we do. Like to the exact time we are leaving, checking in & checking out. Somewhere on vacation I managed to loose an entire day… The cabin ladies assured us that it happens from time to time and not to feel to terrible about it but truth be told I am still shocked. I feel like my brain has been scrambled and left it the fog for a month if not longer. Like I need my internal charger plugged in and my motivation for completing tasks put back in order.

I even forgot to pick up a script before I went on vacation && almost forgot to order my newest round of injections from the pharmacy. I am usually so on top of my medications too… It is really throwing me for a loop. I am honestly surprised I am able to put my underwear on somedays and get with the daily routines. Ok, seriously its really not that bad but the struggle feels like it.

No amount of sleep or caffeine has helped, caffeine in general for an ADHD person does not have the same affect in case you are wondering…

>>>[We generally have to find energy boosts else where other than coffee, teas, sodas, etc. Natural boosts from music, dopamine inducing foods, and other things that increase dopamine help us get through crashes but not always through the lack of motivation or even to help us fight out of the fog. So while we may get our energy levels up we are still a hot mess for the most part. Check out the 7 types of foods below that can help increase Dopamine.

These 7 dopamine-boosting foods will make you feel happy and energized

• Nuts and seeds. [In order to produce dopamine, your body needs to break down an amino acid known as tyrosine, which is present in abundance in nuts such as almonds and walnuts, and seeds such as flax seeds. Snacking on a handful of them during the day can up your dopamine levels and help you a great deal.]
• Non-vegetarian food.[ From chicken, eggs, and meat to fish and prawns—all things that are rich in protein are bound to be rich in tyrosine as per the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA). This simply means that increasing your non-veg intake can also increase your dopamine levels.]
• Vegetarian protein. [If you’re a vegetarian, you have options such as soya, legumes, and beans to get a generous dose of tyrosine and consequently boost your dopamine production.]
• Milk and dairy. [ I don’t do milk but I LOVE ME some Cheese! Cheese, milk, yogurt—basically, all dairy products are a great source of tyrosine and thus, a great way of boosting your dopamine production.]
• Chocolates. [Sweet treats work in two ways. Firstly, they produce the feel-good hormone, serotonin, in the body. And secondly, chocolates contain small amounts of a compound called phenylethylamine, which stimulate your brain cells to release dopamine, or so, says a study conducted at the Georgia Health Sciences University]
• Strawberries. [ Strawberries can also boost serotonin and dopamine production in the body according to a study published in the journal Neural Regeneration Research.]
• Coffee. [According to a study published in the journal Translational Psychiatry, the caffeine present in coffee can make the brain alert and boost dopamine production. So while you may feel more awake from it being a normal person someone like me just gets the dopamine release from it.]] <<<<<

Now, I am not sure if it is because I had to do all the planning and scheduling to make sure we were able to go on vacation, pack bags, usher pets and kids around or what it was that sent me into overdrive… but something has left me feeling very out of sorts.

Normally when we come back from vacation I am refreshed and ready to take on the world, but this go round seems different. And this very well could be my auto immune issues coming into play more so than they have in the past, especially since starting the new injections. Whatever it is leaves me feeling like I am desperately trying to catch up both physically and mentally. I am having a very hard time focusing and keeping my attention on one thing at a time, keeping the energy up enough to complete physical tasks, and the mindfulness to be aware that it going on.

I know it will pass, and I will get myself back on track but trying to get someone to fully understand what is going on with me at the moment is a bit hard. My little family understands but those out side of it struggle at times to understand what it is like to deal with this on a daily basis.

I am full of questions as I write this and record the episode for the B side, and I am struggling to decide what to answer and how best to do so. What does this feel like? How can I explain it better? Do I even really need to offer up an explanation? Why is there shame in feeling this way or not being able to fully share what it is I am feeling with someone who isn’t ADHD… How can I convey the experience with them so they understand me better?

Oh the joys of a broken brain and a messed up body, sometimes I feel they conspire against me and work together to make sure I am completely dysfunctional for days on end. I long for the days when it is just one acting up and dread the days when its both. Now I know that this is rationally not the case but that is how it often feels, and I know many who have the same disorders that I do feel the same way.

Every day is a battle, some we win, some we lose. Today is only a half win, considering I was able to write two blog posts, take care of the dogs, check on the husband and kiddos off and on, plan dinner, and do some laundry, but I have not mastered all of what I WANT TO DO for the week and it is making me feel rather down in the moment. I know in the back of my mind, that tomorrow is another day, and depending on my energy level and mental acuity I might get some of the other things I have to do done. But today I have had several overwhelming moments, multiple times where my mind has had dauntingly fogged up and jumbled thought processes which have been hard to sort out.

This is where I usually remind myself that I should take it one day at a time and it WILL be better tomorrow, however, sometimes I have issues with pushing my positivity the way I need to. Pushing those affirmations into fruition and believing them on hard days. I think even the Normies/Neurotypicals can agree some days are just harder than others, even without ADHD or brain fog messing with things.

I suppose I will attempt for the 500th time in three days I will attempt to get it together and record the podcasts for both this posting and the other one I just made today about balance which you can read here: https://luna-owl.com/2022/07/22/balance-in-life-not-everything-needs-your-energy/

One can only hope that I get it in gear before my brother’s wedding, the Bridgerton ball, and my next doc appointment– Which I suppose I need to talk to her about this some but at the same time she will just smile at me and be like… You know some brain fog is normal right? To which I will smile back and nod, I know its normal with everything I have going on…. BUT I don’t like loosing track of time so badly when it is often something I fight to over compensate about. Just UGH!!!!

Let me know if you ever have a days like this, or if you would like to share your story with us. You can do so by sending us an email to tellyourstory@luna-owl.com

We can’t wait to hear from you all and wish you all nothing but the best!